R-E-S-P-E-C-T find out what it means to me.....

So yesterday, Brian came to visit with the kids. He emailed me after I had posted. Because I wanted him to see the kids, and because I wasn't doing anything else, I said it was fine. In the same email, he also stated "When I am there I want to play with my children alone. So you can go to the store or go upstairs or something" I had replied back with a comment about while I planned to give him alone time, I wasn't going to stay hiding, if I needed to come down to the kitchen or something I would. I didn't get anything back but I assumed that everything was fine. So first, a friend of mine that also works with him shows up, she asks if she can store her carseat here while she goes shopping across the street. I told her I didn't see a problem with it and she and her son came in (he's about the same age as Mac). Then Brian showed up and I was a little torn, I couldn't really leave my friend but I wanted to give him some privacy, so I figured that I would talk with her for a bit and when she left I would go upstairs. So time came (about 20 min later) that she was leaving and Brian stands up and says he's going too, WTH?!? Ben, of course, wants to go as well and I got asked and said okay, Mac started fussing to go to and when they hit the door, I asked if they intended to take her too (they hadn't). So they leave.
So around 8:30 (after their bed time) I wanted to know when they were coming home, so I called, no answer, I finally get a call back 15 minutes later and all I asked was that they maybe come home soon since it was past the bed time. I got a snippy reply but they were headed home. Now when he got here, my house was clean, all the toys were picked up, and everything was neat. After he had played with them, it was a disaster. Toys were everywhere! So when he got back with the kids, I asked him if he could please pick up the toys. That's when all hell broke loose. He snapped, and made a snarky, disrespectful comment to me, something about having cleaned up after me for all this time so why should it be any different now. And I called him on it. I told him that he had no right to talk to me that way and he snapped back that he could talk to me any damn way he wanted to. I'll be honest, at that, my temper snapped and I demanded that he get out. He told me that since he paid rent, it was his house and he could do anything he wanted. It took me 15 minutes to get him out of the house, with our kids clinging to me screaming while he did his best to push me around and control me yet again. This is the man who supposedly loves his kids so much that since he left last week, he's spent 4 hours with them, and I have been bugging him for that. He calls me last minute usually giving me no more then two days notice for when he wants the kids and in his mind, there is no question that when he says he wants the kids, he's going to get the kids. I want my kids to spend time with their dad, I know that the need it and I know that it's what's best for them, but I dislike that I have to feel like I'm pulling him into it kicking and screaming or that I have to have no life in case he wants to see the kids. Our kids are not a toy that he can take out of the box when he wants to play with them and just put away when he's finished. And although he no longer has to pretend to love me, he does have to treat me with respect.

I'm getting my pride back.....